Saturday, January 14, 2012

♔ (late) goals for the new year - and life in general ♔

I know, I know, I'm a whole two weeks late! In my defense, I normally don't "do" New Year's Resolutions. They seem a bit ridiculous to me - why do you have to wait for January 1st to start being better? Why not start whenever you're ready, or whenever you can?

But this year I really do want to see some big changes in my life, it just took me a while to compile a list. And it's not a New Year's Resolution, it's a Life Resolution.

1) The dreaded "Be Healthier". 
It seems that literally almost everyone has this same resolution. I know it's been on my list for years. But I'm not saying I just want to lose weight - I want to be a healthier person. This includes not only getting in shape and eating better, but being a healthier person mentally, which is exponentially a harder task.

So far in January Jonathan and I have revamped our grocery list and are buying almost everything healthy and fresh. It's more expensive by far, and not always as satisfying when you're craving something you definitely don't have, but I do feel a bit better. I'm also working on healthy alternative recipes to things we love, like pizza and chocolate.

As for the whole exercising's not going as well as I planned. We live on the top floor of our complex, so vigorous activity might be rude. I bought a little bicycle pedal machine but it didn't work like I wanted so I took it back. Social anxiety/money is holding me back from a gym membership. I'm thinking about seeing if Jonathan would take up walking with me. I do walk CONSTANTLY at work, which is probably what has prevented me from weighing 400lbs in the past.

But what if I don't lose weight this year? What if I stay exactly the same, or even get bigger? This leads me to goal number 2.

2) Accept yourself, either way. 
Self-explanatory. It's been on the list for 21 years and hasn't happened yet, but I'm working on it harder than ever this year. 

3) Be more social.
The past two years have been the most anti-social of my entire life. I can contribute some of it to anxiety, but most have been my own personal short-comings. I have a bad habit of writing people off without giving them a chance because I feel that we won't have enough in common. I've scared multiple people away by being distant and awkward, and it's something I really need to work on, because I live a fairly lonely life.

4) Be more crafty.
I've been crafty in the past. I know I have all the makings of a crafty person. It's just the commitment to learning and making mistakes that keeps me from doing it. Plus the money involved. But I think it's something I could be very good at, and might give me something to do with the amount of free time I spend bored. I really want to learn to cross-stitch! And finally learn to sew.

5) Save money. 
I've become quite a frugal person as of late, and I like to think that I'm finding better and better ways to save and manage my money. But I'm still thousands of dollars in student loans, and I have no savings to my name. I want to not only save money by finding cheaper alternatives but literally put some away for important things in my life that are yet to come.

6) Be spontaneous! Be happy!
In the past year I haven't really done anything spontaneously fun, and in my memory those are the things that provide me with the most happiness. Photoshoots and dress-ups with friends, random late night drives, trips to somewhere new are the things that have made my life memorable in the past. I want to do way more of it this year!

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